Surrender Forever (Surrender Trilogy Book 3) Read online

  Surrender Forever

  Raven J. Spencer

  Praise for the Surrender Trilogy:

  Surrender Your Heart:

  “A winner.”

  -Rainbow Book Reviews

  “Carter and Penny were both amazing characters”

  -Crystal’s Many Reviewers

  “Great escape novel”

  -Kindle Reader

  Surrender To Me:

  “I am a huge fan of this series”

  -Bookaholic and More Blog

  “The love between them is passionate.”

  -Loek

  Copyright © 2016 by Raven J. Spencer

  All rights reserved.

  This book is a work of fiction. Any resemblance to actual persons, living or dead, events or locales are purely coincidental.

  This book or any portion thereof may not be reproduced or used in any manner whatsoever

  without the express written permission of the author except for the use of brief quotations in a book review.

  For everyone who believes in true love, no matter the odds…

  Chapter One

  Carter

  You know the expression people use when something hits them in the face after a particularly wonderful experience? The honeymoon is over? Well, it truly is. I spent the past few days catching up, making my friends and staff jealous for my tan. They don’t know they have so much more to be jealous about, though I assume they have some ideas. The reality of it will be forever in my memory, the crystal clear water, the stunning sunsets, and Penelope, surrendering body and soul to me. We may joke, play around, but this is a deep profound experience neither of us had before, with any other person. Meant to be.

  The new, alternate reality hits me hard. It’s not possible. I refuse to believe it. Maybe I’m in denial—no, I know better.

  “I’m so sorry,” Nick says, sounding sincere. “I had to bring this to you right away.”

  “I understand,” I say, even though I don’t. I’m mad at him, irrationally, for even suggesting that what the pictures on the screen seem to say, could be true.

  “Good. You know that there are precautions we have to take. I talked to Linda, and she’ll send someone to dig into this.”

  “Who else knows?”

  “Just Linda, you and me for now. I don’t want her to suspect anything while we’re investigating this. It’s important that you don’t slip up either.”

  “Don’t you think I know that?” I snap. “This is ridiculous. There must be another explanation. Somebody is setting this up.”

  “That was my first thought, of course.” Nick shifts uneasily in his chair. “There’s more, Carter. We have phone records that show she received several calls from a Catherine Laurier. That person doesn’t seem to exist. We ran her through the face recognition software and found she goes by a variety of names, has been arrested before on accusations of major credit card fraud, and, get this, money laundering. Somehow, she always got away. Remember Marcie, the waitress at the Café Vienna? She says she knows Catherine. She started coming around about the same time we started staking out the place. How much of a coincidence can that be?”

  “That’s…inconvenient.” I almost laugh at the inappropriate term, but then I might cry, and that would be so much worse. There must be a rational explanation, something, anything that makes Nick’s theory fall apart in a heartbeat. I know it isn’t true. It can’t be.

  “This is serious. It’s not just about a few millions rerouted. You could be framed for a crime!”

  “We’ve been there before.”

  “Before, we saw it coming.”

  I get to my feet, almost instantly assaulted by vertigo. The sensation nearly makes me sick. It’s never a good idea to come to the office without breakfast.

  “Are you okay?”

  When I built this business from the ground, Nick was there for me almost all the way. He knows the company inside out, the risks, the rewards, and I know I can trust him with my life. This changes everything.

  “No, but we’ll get to the bottom of it. Whatever it appears to be, there’s no doubt someone is trying to steal my money and make me look bad meanwhile. You do what you have to do. I’ll give you a week, then I’ll talk to Penelope.”

  His expression tells me clearly that he disapproves. Nick knows he won’t change my mind. He will try anyway.

  “Carter…”

  “Where are we on Mom’s case? Is everything still quiet?”

  Before Penelope and I went on our delayed honeymoon, my mother called me about a friend of hers who was in trouble. Nick took care of it as ordered. The woman who was in a bad situation, dating a guy with dark secrets, is safe and sound now, living life out of the abuser’s reach.

  “All went according to plan as you know. This is not your problem.”

  I give him a laugh that’s convincing no one. “That’s what I have you for, right, to take care of the problems? By the way, while you’re at it, can you get down to the kitchen and get me breakfast? Eggs, bacon, a bit of fruit. Black coffee.”

  My stomach is growling. I’m not even sure I can handle food after what I’ve just heard. It’s not true. In less than a week, we’ll have found the explanation.

  “Trouble in paradise?” he asks.

  “No. Stayed in bed past the alarm,” I shoot back at him which shuts him up. He finally goes to order my breakfast from the kitchen. I could have done this myself, but I need a moment.

  I agree with Nick in one thing—it might be better if Penelope never knows. We’ll clear this up, and it will be as if the shadow of suspicion never existed.

  I know she would never do this to me.

  Penelope has a full day with classes at the university and her internship in the philanthropy department. On top of that, I promised to be more transparent about some projects Nick and I started a while ago—you could call it philanthropy too, but these are off the books, like the quick intervention for Mom’s friend. This morning’s alarming news won’t change anything. I have to act as if nothing has happened, and so far, it is nothing.

  My breakfast arrives, and I use the excuse to stall a little longer. I have to look at the evidence and assess it, take measures to protect my business.

  It’s going to be a long day. Already I wish I could rewind to the moments before the alarm rang, waking Penelope in a way we both enjoy so much. Instead, I have to deal with this rude awakening.

  It’s unthinkable.

  * * * *

  Penelope comes by to get me for dinner. Between meetings, catching up with Nick’s progress and assuring my mother that her friend will never have to worry again, the day flew by. I promised Nick to stay quiet for a week.

  I don’t know if I can do it.

  Penelope breezes into my office, all excited about how her day went.

  “I think the test went well,” she says.

  “I’m sure it did. You studied hard these past days.”

  You also received five phone calls from Catherine Laurier, a person with many aliases. Why?

  “That’s not even the best news.” She leans over the desk and kisses me. I catch a whiff of shampoo and perfume, my body easily overriding the worries in my mind. Not worries. Not doubts. The security camera from the store in Paris, showing Penelope talking to Laurier…It could be completely innocent.

  “Tell me. I could use some good news.”

  “Did something happen?”

  I turn away from her concerned, wide-eyed gaze, close a file and turn off the computer.

  “No, nothing out of the ordinary. I just wish I was still somewhere on a beach with you, but we had to get back to work at s
ome point. What’s the news?”

  “Traci says she’s really happy with my work.” She laughs, her demeanor happy, if a bit self-conscious. Why?

  “Even if there were all those days where I couldn’t be there,” Penelope adds. “Well, I did try hard to make up for that. She thinks I could go to New York. There are some workshops for people in my field, and another event where she thinks I should do a lecture. I’m nervous already.”

  “No need. You’ll be great.”

  “I’m not sure. If someone like you gets stage fright…” She perches on my desk, her navy blue pencil skirt riding up. I barely keep the sigh from coming out.

  “You’re ready to go to dinner?” she asks.

  “Yeah, let’s go. You can tell me all about it on the way.”

  “Where are we going?”

  “Your choice. What are you in the mood for?”

  “Thai would be great,” Penelope says. “I’d love to celebrate with you later. New York really is a big deal. It’s something I did myself.”

  This stings a little, even though I know she didn’t mean it. I have no reason to be so sensitive about the subject. It took Penelope a while to adjust to the lifestyle we have, not to feel constantly guilty about it. She’s right. New York is a big deal.

  My employees are loyal. In the end, they do what I say, but Traci would have told me if giving Penelope a job in the philanthropy department wasn’t a good idea. In fact, this is where she thrives. I don’t expect her to sit at home waiting for me all day, so once she has finished her studies, she’ll have a permanent position there.

  Probably.

  I don’t think she would ever betray me, but the connection to Laurier is odd. Nick and the crew will have my back, but I also have to make sure Penelope is safe. That, and to have her all to myself, have always been my priorities.

  Nothing has changed.

  The waiter has brought water and wine, and I attempt a lighter tone for the conversation. “Would you like to go shopping, for New York—or in New York? I’m sure we can make time for that.” I do have a personal shopper. I also used to leave the house without breakfast on a regular basis, much to the chagrin of Marlene, my chef and good friend. Penelope has changed my habits. She made me a happier person.

  “I think I’m okay. I didn’t know you were free to go…?”

  “I can make time. What, you don’t want me to be there?”

  Penelope hesitates for a split second. “I think I’d be kidding myself if I said it would be easy to be apart from you. Sometimes, it’s hard to be apart from you the whole day—I know Haley and Lara probably think it’s silly, but that’s the way it is. I know I could do it on my own.”

  “That’s not the question.”

  “No, it’s not. If you’re okay to come, I’d love that, but don’t drop everything on my behalf. I’ll survive if I have to.” She leans close to whisper, “If all else fails, we could have phone sex.”

  I nearly spit out my wine at the suggestion. This is not on option. I want to touch her, taste her, and feel the shiver run down my spine when she says my name the moment she comes. The dark red wine helps me forget about the daunting revelations—the sexually suggestive conversation helps too.

  “No way. I’ll be with you, and you’ll have the real thing. There are some people I could meet in New York. I could show you one of our offices there.”

  Penelope’s jaw drops ever so slightly. “One of…never mind. Okay, yes, I’d appreciate to have you there.”

  Our food arrives, and like everything on the menu, it’s delicious. I order a second quarter of wine for both of us. Why, I have a driver, and I can just drop Penelope off at her workplace tomorrow.

  “You’re trying to get me drunk?” she asks. There’s a sparkle in her eyes that might be from the candle on the table, or undisguised lust.

  “Do I have to?”

  “No. I’m all yours and you know it.”

  I return her smile as we click our glasses together. “Can’t harm to check.”

  I excuse myself to go to the bathroom where I check my phone. Nick has sent me a picture that shows Penelope in a café, talking to Catherine Laurier. This doesn’t make sense. Penelope doesn’t have to revert to secrecy and lies for money. I would give her whatever she asks for—when we got married, to the surprise of my team, I signed over half of my business to her. Gillian who is a gifted lawyer and head of my legal department, was not happy, but in the end, she had to accept my decision.

  There is an explanation somewhere in here, and Nick better work hard to get me the answers in that one week. Even though Penelope technically could have made those transactions, there’s no reason why she should have. She didn’t even know who I was before I got her kidnapped.

  I turn off the phone and join her at the table. “How about dessert?”

  “Yeah,” she whispers, “but not here.”

  “I like the way you think. Just let me get the check.”

  Chapter Two

  I’m getting along well with my mother these days, though the memories echo in my mind. She used to be worried about my prospects of finding a suitable husband, because I competed with men and talked back to them—actually, I still do. After that it was making too much money, no man will be comfortable with that…It was Christmas, and I blurted out that it was fine with me and I didn’t care, because “I’m a lesbian. I don’t care if anyone’s comfortable with that or not.”

  She didn’t say much about it, no emotional affirmation or rejection, though my siblings convinced her to come to the wedding. She saw me with Penelope, saw how happy I am, which made all the difference.

  The dark thoughts keep invading my mind, though I know in my heart that Penelope is innocent in all this. If she said yes for the money, she does a really bad job of taking advantage. Money laundering? Don’t get me wrong, she’s smart, but she doesn’t have the criminal energy to pull this off. I know this, because I’ve worked within the law, and then crossed some of its boundaries when it came to making women safe. Penelope is excited about those projects, because they help change lives for the better. She’s not the type to steal for a thrill—or to steal at all. I know her well enough for that.

  She didn’t have to stay…yet she does.

  I arrange the bedroom to my liking while she is in the shower. Laying out everything I need to make her experience near transcendent is calming me, the pieces falling back into place. I can trust my instincts.

  If Nick and the people around me are kind of paranoid, well, they have reason to be. We live in a cutthroat world. I have enemies, or those who’d like to flatter themselves with that title. My wife is not one of them.

  Penelope comes out of the bathroom wearing a cream-colored satin robe. Her eyes widen when she sees what I have prepared.

  “You don’t have an early start tomorrow?” she asks, half amused, half intrigued.

  I can sense her excitement as I step into her personal space and slide the robe from her shoulders. Unable to resist, I lean in to place a kiss on her neck before I step back.

  “Yes, I do. Wait for me here, and don’t touch anything.”

  Her lips twitch as she unsuccessfully tries to hide the smile. It’s not like she expects a punishment if she did—it’s not that kind of lifestyle. I might need a little reassurance tonight, that’s all.

  “You can trust me,” she says, kneeling in the middle of the bed, sitting back, the image making me breathless.

  “Good. I’ll be right back.”

  I take my shower quickly, and against habit, leave my clothes in the bathroom to pick them up later. To escape into a fantasy with Penelope has become urgent, as there’s no saying when we’ll have another opportunity—or what will be uncovered tomorrow.

  “Now you’re in a hurry,” Penelope teases me when I return, and I give her a mild smile.

  “There’s no need to rush.” I brush a hand down her arm, satisfied that her skin is warm. Next, I pick up the black silk tie and carefully bind he
r wrists in front of her.

  “Is this a special occasion I’m not aware of? I know it’s not our anniversary yet.”

  “Do I need one to make love to you twice a day?”

  She shivers. “No.”

  Her breath quickens as I show her the mask, a beautiful object made of silk and lace, a bit of a change from the blindfolds we usually use. Penelope knows I’d stop this anytime if she were uncomfortable, but I feel the need to ask her again. Maybe, if you kick off your relationship by kidnapping someone, no matter how justified those means were, some trust issues remain. It’s important to work on them.

  “You’re all right with this?”

  “Yeah.” The one word is almost a gasp. “Just don’t let me wait all night, please?”

  It’s for both of us. For her, to know that she’ll be safe in my hands, no matter what. Those weren’t empty promises. For me, to know that this is where she belongs even when I don’t turn the key at night, when she can come and go as she wishes.

  Including access to all my accounts. I chase the thought out of my head, focusing on the beautiful woman I have vowed to cherish. It’s so easy. I kiss her, tenderly, my hand grasping a handful of her hair in the back, pulling just a little, the way Penelope likes it. Her cheeks are warm, the small sound escaping her almost a moan. More of that later… One quick movement, and the strapless bra is gone.

  I leave the slip for the moment, ease her down on the bed and fasten her bound wrists. This is okay, I decide. She’s already shifting, impatient, sighing in pleasure as I cup her breasts in my hands. I brush my tongue over a nipple, suck it into my mouth, feel it peak with interest. I haven’t been on the other side of this equation often, but enough to know how much she wants to use her hands right now. Her fingers twitch, underneath me, her legs fall open.

  “Feels good?” I ask before moving to the right.